“Life’N”

     Life is full of transitions. I’m finally at a place where I have accepted this and learned to roll with the shift. As a child, teenager, and then into early adulthood; change was very scary for me. I believed that things should either stay the same, or just simply get better. I don’t know who sprinkled that fairy dust onto me, because we all know life does not work this way.

     I learned that change is inevitable, and the good and bad go hand in hand. However, when we’re experiencing something bad or feel any pain this life has to offer, we usually don’t see the good in the bad… Not initially, at least. It’s not until some time has passed and we’ve actually allowed ourselves to feel those uncomfortable emotions all the way through, that we then begin to see the lesson in such painful experiences.

     After 37 years of life, I have experienced both grief and growth in many forms. The two have taught me gratitude and grace (see what I did there…LOL). I have grieved people I lost both in life and death, meaning that there are some relationships that I had to walk away from for my own peace of mind. Past friends and lovers whom were not meant to continue this life journey with me. Some of which I may still have love for, however, their role in my story has expired and vice versa.

     I have also lost some people to death. People who were close to me. People who played a pertinent role in my life. People I loved dearly and never got to say goodbye to. As sad as it was and still is some days, those losses have taught me to appreciate experiences. The good times and moments spent with self and loved ones. The moments and memories that outlive people, places, and things. I say the experience because we should not possess or act possessive towards others… but as humans we do it both unintentionally and consciously. When we love someone so dearly, we try to protect them from the world with wishes of shielding them from pain we may have felt ourselves.

     Above all, I’m grateful that I got to experience it all. It has made me into the woman I am today. I like to consider myself well-rounded, with morals and integrity that I stand on. With this “new world order,” I know I tend to stick out like a sore thumb.

     I say this because the world has become so superficial. People give and show ego in spite of real love. Folks have replaced loyalty and genuineness with popularity and clout. I for sure do not fit in that world. I’ve had an old soul since my younger days. I still believe in real love and true friendship. Like rapper Fabolous said, “I see the vanity but where the morality go.”

     I believe in showing up for my loved ones and giving support, especially when it matters most. I consider myself a paragraph in a one sentence world. I love people who walk through life like they’re stitching the world back together, one act of kindness at a time. Those are my people and I hope we find each other.

     If you or someone you know has been struggling, know that there are clinicians here at Transformation Counseling & Consulting that can help work through that struggle to improve quality living.